It's been quite some time since the writing of my last blog but I haven't really been moved by anything enough to write about it LOL That is until this morning. I woke early and thought that I would take advantage of the quiet time and do some writing in my journal so I could reflect on the past week and hopefully gain a fresh perspective.
Earlier in the week I decided to draw up a financial plan for 2013. It wasn't pretty. I spent several days tweaking it, trying to crunch numbers that have been crunched more times that I can count and cut corners that have already been cut 3 times over. It didn't change the fact though that we are looking at another year of sacrifice; another year of very tight living. Probably more so than we had to this year even though I never thought that possible. Then last night, the ever present issue of our house situation hit me hardest.
In a nutshell our house, a double wide trailer, is still in the name of my husband and his ex. We have made numerous attempts to get it out of her name and into ours and all have failed. She's not happy about the situation, nor are we since all ties were supposed to have been cut by the end of 2009. Fortunately we have been able to keep her at bay by keeping her in the loop as we work through the issues surrounding it. She has given us until 2013 to get it squared away but I can't help but think to myself, what if we can't make it happen? She has threatened to involve a lawyer but really what will that matter? He can't change our financial situation, nor can he force an institution to approve a loan. Yet still it plagues me.
My thought is this: she should be thankful that we are paying the mortgage on time, thankful that we haven't had to go into foreclosure or file for bankruptcy. Not that I don't understand where she is coming from but I pray that if again there is no resolve for this situation in 2013 that she would know that we are doing everything in our power to rectify this situation and that it WILL happen... just not in the time frame we all would like.
So last night I became very anxious about all of this and the only thing that brought me back to peace was repeating to myself that God will never leave us of forsake us and that with Him all things are possible. Which leads me back to my journal writing this morning and digging into my Bible to find the scripture references. I didn't realize the "forsake" verse was in both the Old and New Testament, probably because I spend alot more time in the New. But when I turned to the book of Joshua I knew that God had lead me there for a reason. Joshua, chapter 1, verses 5-8 reads:
5 No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.
6 “Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. 7 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. 8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
After reading this I was in total awe of it. This was God's way of bringing me right back where I need to be, into the palm of His hand. Not trying to fight a battle on my own, but relying on Him and his Word to get me through it. Three times he says to "be strong and courageous." I am now completely filled with peace and am confident that whatever happens in 2013 that God will see us through. It kind of makes me thankful for the rough year that is coming to a close. I believe it was his way of preparing us for what lies ahead. You never really know how much your faith and trust in God can grow until you are faced with situations that you have never been in before. His word tells me that I do not have to be terrified or discouraged because He will be with me wherever I go. What an awesome promise! No matter where I go, I'm never alone because God is always with me.
Until next time ~
Be Blessed in the Son,
Brandy
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